Chapter Four

Cause you only live forever in the lights you make
When we were young we used to say
That you only hear the music when your heart begins to break
Now we are the kids from yesterday

Blaine didn't see Kurt again before he boarded the plane that would take him to Ohio for the first time in years.  He had planned on it, but every time his finger hovered over the 'call' button or he thought about sending a text something stopped him.  It was weird, he knew it was.  Nobody was best friends with their exes, at least not when said ex was still in love with them.  There was no way it would work, and Blaine had a feeling that Carter already was suspicious of him and the last thing he wanted was for Carter and Kurt to argue because of him. 

Besides, with final exams and projects and everything he was swamped as it was, so on December 22 when he rolled his suitcase through the airport, running for his gate, he barely thought about the fact that he'd have almost two weeks living with Kurt because it was too overwhelming.

He wasn't idiotic enough to think it would turn out like some fairy-tale, like Kurt would suddenly realize he had loved him and only him all along and fall into his arms and his bed, but he did miss being with Kurt as a person and that was what he was looking forward the most to.

He daydreamed the flight away, picking up his luggage and meeting Finn at the exit of the terminal (the other boys had flown to Ohio a couple of days sooner but this was the earliest flight Blaine could get from booking so late), and Finn grinned and clapped him on the back before leading him out to his old pick-up truck. 

"Yeah, I know she's a piece of junk but she still runs, right?  And it totally doesn't pay to own a car in New York so I just leave her here until I need her," he explained, waiting until Blaine got in before they pulled away and started the journey from Columbus to Lima. 

Blaine was silent for a while, lost in thought and just watching the scenery go by, but eventually he cleared his throat and turned to look at Finn.  "Can I ask...does he know I'm coming?" he inquired, not sure what he'd prefer Finn's answer to be.

"Yeah.  We kinda had to check with him, dude.  I mean, how awkward would it be for you to be in our house for like two weeks when he really didn't want you there?" Finn shrugged like Blaine should have known this, and maybe he should have, but he was relieved that Kurt did want him there.

"So he's okay with it?"

"He, like, didn't seem too sure, but he said it was okay," Finn shrugged and Blaine supposed that was as good as it was going to get.

"Okay.  As long as...I don't want to ruin his holiday or anything," he said, feeling slightly guilty, but Finn leaned over to pat his leg. 

"You won't.  It'll be an awesome Christmas, Blaine."

Blaine nodded, smiling at Finn before turning back to the window. 

For once, he believed that it might be.

000

He was welcomed with far more enthusiasm than he'd anticipated by both Carole and Burt, with a hug from the former that he lingered in a little too long (his own parents weren't ones for physical affection, after all, and it had been a long time since he'd gotten a mothering hug) and a solid shoulder clap from Burt as the older man gruffly grunted, "It's good to see you again, kid."

"You as well, sir," Blaine nodded stiffly as Burt laughed.

"It's just Burt, Blaine.  I think we know each other well enough for that," he'd smiled then and gone to watch TV, Finn loping after him, and Carole had told him that Kurt was still readying his room in the basement if he wanted to take his things down.

He did, smelling the familiar smells of the Hummel-Hudson house and trekking the familiar paths within (it really had been like a home to him while Kurt was still in high school) and he pushed open the door to the guest room to see Kurt just finishing up putting the sheets on the bed.

"Hi," he glanced back over his shoulder, giving Blaine a tiny smile, and Blaine felt a warm thrill at the sight of Kurt in casual clothing. 

He was still wearing things that fit him perfectly, a hooded sweatshirt that was taut around his toned biceps and yoga pants that clung rather distractingly to his thighs and ass, but Blaine knew that casual!Kurt was something few people had the pleasure of seeing and knowing that Kurt was okay with him seeing it now...that was big. 

"Good flight?" Kurt asked vaguely, smoothing his hands over the bedspread and standing up, and Blaine nodded. 

"Good as it always is, I guess.  I haven't been back to Ohio for a couple of years so I'm not that used to it, but..." he shrugged.  "I'm sorry if you don't want me here.  I can leave, but Finn said..."

"Blaine.  Stop," Kurt laughed shortly, the sound free for the brief moment it hung in the air between them.  "If I hadn't wanted you here I would have said so.  I meant it when I said that...I wanted us to be friends again.  We can be that, right?"

"We were friends first," Blaine nodded, even though he knew it would be difficult, especially if Kurt kept smiling at him like that.  "But...thank you.  And your whole family.  For taking me in like this."

"I know what your parents are like," Kurt replied.  "Anyway, everything should be set up for you.  Feel free to take over the dresser and the closet if you want to take your clothes out of the suitcase.  Bathroom's through there, which you know, and you can use whatever you want as far as shampoo and shower gel goes.  If you need anything just ask one of us and we'll direct you to it.  Make yourself at home, Blaine," Kurt walked closer and Blaine gulped, still feeling awed being in his presence. 

"Thank you.  Again," he stammered and Kurt patted his arm on the way by, sweeping out of the room on silent feet. 

"Dinner should be in an hour or so, but you're free to come up and watch sports with Dad and Finn.  They'll be there most of the break," Kurt's voice wafted back to him as he started to unpack, hanging up a few things like he was reluctant to make himself too at home, but a moment later he realized how silly that was and emptied his suitcase. 

He still hated the strained awkwardness between himself and Kurt, the knowledge that neither of them quite knew what to say, but he hoped that over the next two weeks or so it would get better.

He really, really hoped it would.

000

"Blaine Anderson, in the flesh and as fine as ever!"

Blaine froze grabbing his coffee from the counter at the Lima Bean, his face forced into a smile as he turned and laid eyes on one person he thought he'd never see again.

Not that he and Sebastian were enemies any longer, or even frosty with each other, but Blaine was running into a lot of ghosts from his past lately and this just seemed too coincidental. 

"Sebastian," he breathed out, unsurprised when the other man hugged him from behind for a brief moment before letting go.  "Thought you'd be celebrating the holidays in Paris or somewhere equally as fabulous."

"Nah, Dad had a big case he had to stay and work on so I decided to spend it in good 'ol rustic Ohio.  You got a minute?  Want to catch up?" he gestured to a table and Blaine nodded, truly happy to see a familiar face. 

"So how's law school?" he asked once they were seated, sipping at his drip coffee, and Sebastian shrugged before breaking into his normal smug grin.

"I think I'm going to be an excellent lawyer.  I'm very persuasive, you know," he leaned forward, almost whispering it, and Blaine had to snort because Sebastian's methods of ‘persuasion’ were more suited to the bedroom than the courtroom.  "No, I'm enjoying it.  And you?  What brings the New Yah-ker back to the midwest?" he grinned and Blaine rolled his eyes at his rather botched impression of a Brooklyn accent as he took a breath and recounted his story in short form, keeping only the important parts in.

Sebastian, to his immense credit, didn't make a single snarky remark, and if there was something like sympathy in his eyes Blaine tried to convince himself he was only imagining it. 

"I know, it's stupid," Blaine said before Sebastian could.  "I mean...just move on already, Anderson.  He obviously has," Blaine sniffed and took another quick drink of his coffee before Sebastian spoke.

"I don't think that, Blaine," his voice was soft, almost reflective, and Blaine felt a stab of anger go through him. 

Why couldn't he be like Sebastian?  Why did he have to be such a sappy romantic that he expected love and forevers and hated meaningless sex?  "Well, not like you've ever been in love," he grumbled, and the shocked look on the other man's face stopped him.

"The me of five years ago wasn't, but I think I've learned a lot since then," Sebastian said firmly, and Blaine immediately felt guilty.

"Seb, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have..."

"It's okay.  I don't blame you," the man shrugged.  "And I'd love to stay and chat but I'm supposed to meet Hunter because the blasted idiot left his shopping until the last minute and he's forgotten to buy that cat of his a present again."

Blaine didn't think anything of it until he saw the tiny, almost imperceptible smile on Sebastian's face, and suddenly his earlier words about love made more sense.  "You and...I thought he wasn't 'even remotely bi-curious,'" Blaine quoted as Sebastian threw his head back and laughed.

"He's not.  He's extremely bi-curious.  And oh so obedient in the bedroom.  Military training," Sebastian raised an eyebrow and Blaine couldn't hide a smile at that one.  "So good at following orders.  And besides, I just told you I'm persuasive.  I don't take kindly to being turned down, and I always get what I want.  Well, except you," his eyes raked over Blaine's body, feeling like pure, raw sex, and Blaine shuddered without meaning to.  "But you're single now.  We're always up for a threesome, if you ever..."

"Thanks, but I'll pass," Blaine finally found his voice and Sebastian, hauled him to his feet and into a tight hug, keeping his hands on Blaine's shoulders as they parted. 

"Here, give me your number, we can meet up again," he said, and they exchanged numbers before Sebastian had to leave. "And...don't give up on Kurt.  I know you, Blaine, and I know that you're pretty damn good at getting what you want, too," he left with a parting wave that Blaine returned, and as he sat back down to finish his coffee, he realized he had a lot more to think about. 

000

When he got back to Kurt's house, he was accosted by the other man as soon as he got through the door, something about cookies and brownies and icing and 'Carole's picking up an extra shift you're the only one I trust, please,’ and he was in the kitchen, whipping up a couple of batches of frosting while Kurt flitted around like a mad thing trying to coordinate the ovens and cooling racks and make more batter at the same time.

It was weirdly domestic, the silence between them comfortable for the first time since they'd re-connected, and Blaine watched Kurt move around him with practiced ease and thought that if they could do this every day of their lives he'd be utterly content. 

Sebastian was right, after all.

He was pretty good at getting what he wanted.

And when Kurt turned to smile at him, radiant despite flour in his hair and a smear of batter on his cheek Blaine really wanted to swipe off with his thumb, he felt like maybe there was more hope than he'd led himself to believe.